Thursday, January 17, 2008

Baldness

I'm one of those follicaly challenged people who is too cheap and chemical phobic to use Rogain. So, in addition to my other disgusting physical defects, I'm stuck bald.

I bashed my head yesterday and now have a small cut prominent on my head.

It occured to me this morning that baldness occurs at proper ages for it to be helpful!

When one is born, the head is bald so that parents can immediately notice injuries to it.
Then, when one is old enough that they should be able to at least notify the proper people of a cranial injury, the head is covered in hair so that the injury will not clearly show and cause embarassment.
Finally, when one is old enough that mental faculties begin to regress towards the first stage, baldness returns so that the offspring or hopefully still lucid spouse will notice.

Baldness is therefore just a self perservation mechanism. Note, that this makes it likely that older people with a full head of hair are probably not as important to Mother Nature.

Of course, the fact that I began my torturous slide into baldness in my 30's could be some cause for concern.

2 comments:

R.A. Porter said...

See? I've always said there was something not right about Ronald Reagan!

Full head of hair - jet black, no less - at his age. Mother Nature definitely had no use for him!

2old4this said...

Ooooh, good one!

Of course, one could also say that those with a full head of hair later in life are smart and clear enough not to need the protection of baldness!

So you put me in the position of disparaging myself in order to defend one of the greatest presidents in history.

Geez, thanks a lot.